Stay Fearless
by AlwaysFearless19
Summary: Renesmee Cullen, 17, hasn't had anything easy. From a father who disappeared to a mother gone off the deep end. She's sent to camp for the summer to counsel. She meets the mysterious Jacob Black. They grow close, but will her past get in the way of that?
1. Preface

**Prologue**

I stood there, frozen. Clutching onto the side of the bathroom counter, it was the only thing holding me up at this moment. The girl looking back at me in the mirror only

disgusted me. She gave into temptation. Told herself summer love could last. Broke every rule she ever set for herself. It was all about to be thrown back in her face.

And she had it coming. She knew better. I knew better...

The faint sound of footsteps grew louder. It reminded me of what I would tell mom. _Mom_. I knew she would disappointmented, to put it lightly. She has been let down so many

times, so many countless times. It was one of those rules I had set for myself, never disappoint mom. She didn't deserve it. But this isn't about her right now. This is about what

I'm going to do. How am I going to tell _Him_? I haven't seen since the last day of camp and, even though there is Facebook, he deserves to be told face-to-face. I resepect him

far too much. More than I do myself at this moment.

A soft knock hits the door, the knob turns and I quickly gussy myself up. My sister, Charley, pops her head. She gives a soft smile. "Ness, are you okay?", she asks me. She

looks at me skeptically. I put on my best fake smile and nod. Charley hesitates and begins to speak. "Ness, I'm your sister. Don't lie to me. Please". I gather up every ounce of

courage I had, grab the test off of the window ledge and stand back in front of her.

"Charley, I'm pregnant".


	2. Where the Story Starts

**Where the Story Starts...**

You know when they tell you, everything happens for a reason? But no matter what, you still question why it happened. It consumes your every thought, becomes part of your

everyday life, haunts you in your sleep. Well, thats how I feel. Not just me, but my mother, as well as my younger sister. Why, you ask? My father left. No explanations. No

goodbyes. No nothing. He just left.

At first, it was painful. My mom would just be locked in her room, hidden under the blankets, clutching onto a pillow. Like she was trying to hold herself together. When she

did leave the room, she was a mess. Her dark brown hair unbrushed, dark circles under her chocolate brown eyes. She couldn't sleep, and when she did, my sister and I were

woken up by her screams. My dad leaving destroyed her. No, not just her. It destroyed all three of us.

My Grandpa Carlisle and Grandma Esme tried to help out. Everytime Mom told them to go away. They brought memories and thoughts of Dad. She didn't want more pain. She

didn't want more people to leave her. To leave us.

"Bella, let us help you. For the girls", my Grandmother Esme tried to reason with her. "They need you to be strong. They need their mother. Renesmee and Charley need you".

But nothing worked.

Eventually, they drifted away from us. Their visits became less frequent. But Grandpa

Carlisle did call to check up on her, on us, and kept insisting Mom go see a therapist and that maybe me and Charley should, too. He genuinely cared, and he and Grandma were

hurt by Dad leaving, too. Their eldest son, taking off and abandoning his wife of eightteen years and two daughters. They tried to find him, but nothing ever came up. It was like

he dropped off of the face of the Earth.

I knew the only person my mom would really want talk to was Grandpa Charlie, but that would be impossible. He passed away a month before Cahrley was born - hence why my

parents named her that, with a slight modification. But mom tried. She prayed, asking 'Charlie to give her the strength to carry on'.

It finally did get to the point were everything was a dull ache, but even that took nearly a year. Even then, and still now, the slightest thought, photo or any reminder bring

back some of the pain. I guess it always will. There are still days when Mom cries herself to sleep, Charley has a nightmare and I'm reminded of Dad through the simplest of

things. Like the emerald green of crayon that was similar to his eye color. Walking through the park and picturing our old family picnics, flying kites, Dad running around with

Charley on his shoulders...

His reasons for leaving are still unknown and no one has heard of him. We don't know if he'll come back one day, if we'll ever hear from him again. All I know is, that after

this summer I begin my senior year, and my own father won't be seeing me graduate. On most days, I just shrug my shoulders at the thought. But today, on the two and half

year anniversary of his leaving, I wipe a tear from my cheek.


	3. Do I Have To?

**Author's Note: Well, I'm extremely happy with the few reviews I've recieved so far for the preface and the pre-chapter. I'm glad that some are looking forward to the rest (: Anyway, I know these chapter are somewhat short, but as the story progresses they'll get longer. The begining is meant to give you just enough, as compared to later on when you need everything bit.**

**Still looking fo a Beta, so anyone interested let me know!**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own the characters, they just play out in my world.**

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><p>The alarm clock on my rightside nightstand set off high alert. I pulled the covers over my head, praying that I could have another 10 minutes to sleep. But on this morning, I<p>

knew that wasn't going to happen. So, with the time I had, I dragged myself from my safe haven, grabbed my camp counselor shirt and my demin shorts, and walked over to

my vanity mirror. Right away my attention was drawn to my paleness and the circles forming under my eyes. But I knew I didn't have too much time, so I made due with an

SPF tinted moisturizer and brushing my copper hair into a ponytail.

If there was one thing I knew about this summer , it would drag. My mom had decided to sign me up to be a volunteer camp councelor for two months, simply because she

thought it would look better for college. College was a whole other thing. I liked school, I wasn't a 4.0 average student, but I did well enough to just make honor roll. But college,

I felt like I needed a year break, to find out what exactly it was I wanted to do. My mom and I didn't see eye to eye on this...

I grabbed my suitcase, surely packed with more than I needed since we had a uniform, and made my way downstairs. My mom and sister, Charley, were at the table,

mom reading through one of her magazines and Charley eating her cereal. As the sound of my suitcase hitting the hardwood floor filled the room, my mom looked up at me

and smiled. "Oh, Renesmee, you look so cute in your councelor uniform. Very offical". I let go of my suitcase and rolled my eyes. "Mom, please don't". She turned towards me

and put her hands on her hips. "What? One summer doing something good won't kill you. Maybe you'll learn something new or meet new people". I sighed. There was

nothing I could do, I would just have to to endure the next two months. _This won't __last forever,_ I told myself. _It's just one summer, you can live._

Charley sat directly across from my usual spot at the table. She focused so intently on her cereal, spooning out all of the little marshmellow shapes. Unlike most children, she

didn't like them. I swear, she was one odd kid.

Mom broke my train of thought. "Ness, honey, smile. You get a summer in the sun, helping kids and participating in fun activities", she smiled, but then it dropped to a

somewhat stern look intertwined with a frown. "But remember that is all you are there for. No funny bussiness", She set her fork down and looked me directly in the eyes. I

could see the pain that still resided there, "I mean it".

And I knew she did, but I still didn't know what she had to worry about. I was going to be a camp counselor for kids ranging from eight to 12, for christ sakes. It made no sense.

And even though I shouldn't, it left me with that she was tying all to how she was hurt by dad. That was it, it had to be.

It just seemed like everything always tied to dad.


	4. I'll Be Missing You

**Author's Note: I finished finalizing this chapter several days sooner than planned. I hope you like it (:**

**Your reviews have been lovely. Any questions will be answered throughout the story. Just keep reading!**

**I do not own the characters, they just live in my world.**

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><p>The three hour drive was horrible. Listening to my mom attempting to rap along with some song on the radio was becoming unbearable. But I bit my tounge. I had always tried<p>

to be nicer to mom since dad left. No call, no letters. Nothing. Mom was hurt. No not hurt, destroyed. He was her one and only love. And he left. We don't talk about it to each

other, but we all think about it. I know we do. I know I do...

The rain had stopped just over an hour ago and the sun was trying to break through. Charley was in the back seat, her eyes set looking out the window in search of a rainbow. I

smiled. No matter what, her sense of imagination always had a way to cheer me up. Even for a 14 year old, she held this innocence that was indescribable. It was rare.

Something that even I didn't posess. It was something she'd need to hold onto when she starts high school in September.

I closed my eyes and my mind drifted me back to when I was 11 and dad took me, along with Charley to the park. She was seven at the time and dad carried her on his

shoulders. He ran around, holding on to her ankles, making "airplane" sounds... Things shouldn't have ended up where they have today. I hate it.

With that my thoughts went to a darker place. A place I never wanted to visit intentionally, but it happened nonetheless. The day I had found out dad left. It was a cloudy,

rainy, mid-November day. I was on the bus on the way home from school. I couldn't wait to run in the front door and tell mom and dad what had happened that day. The late fall

Harvest Formal was that upcoming weekend and I had been asked by this guy in my biology class. I sort of had a crush on him at the time and it amazed me he asked.

The bus came up to my drive way and I rushed off as soon as I could - I remember I almost tripped on my way. I made my way up the steps and turned open the door. Right

away, something felt off. I couldn't explain it at that moment. But I knew. That feeling in the pit of your stomach never lies.

The warmth of the sun flooded over my skin, I told myself that if I was going to be stuck at this camp for two months, I would at least try to make the best of it. For starters,

taking the time to not think about dad. Yeah, easier said than done. 

"Nessie, Nessie", mom nearly sang in my ear, while her hand rested on my arm. "We're here. Come on, I'll help with your suitcase". I could hear her close her door, then the

sound of Charley's door followed. My eyes slowly fluttered open. _It's time to get this over __with,_ I told myself. _The sooner you get out of this car, the sooner camp will start and _

_you'll be __back home._

Charley must have opened my door because there she was. I had to squint due to the rays of the sun, but I could've sworn she was mom. I mean, she did look a mini happier

version of her. Charely was a real trooper. One foot after the other I stepped out the car onto the gravel in the parking area near a building. In the distance, I could see a

smallish group of people gathering. I turned towards my mom and Charely. Both had their own smiles on, mom with a few tears. How did I know she wouldn't leave here with

dry eyes? 

I hugged them both, they made their way back into the car and waved one last time. I watched the car become smalled and smaller until it had finally disappeared down the

road.


	5. I Was Enchanted to Meet You

**A/N: So, I realize that it took me a week to get this chapter up. Its been a vert hectic one, let me tell you! Haha. I will do my very best to get the next up by Christmas Eve, but no promises. Just keep an eye out :)**

**Once again, thank you for the positive feed back and to all of you who have saved this story in your favorites. It means more to me than I can express. Honestly, I never even imagined anyone would even read, I just decided it was time to move on to the next step. So, thank you, you're all fearless 3**

Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters, etc etc etc. They are owned by S. Meyer. I just place them in my own world.**

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><p>They were offically gone. From this point forward, I would not be seeing my mom and sister for over 2 months. Part of me couldn't help but feel that bit of freedom, while<p>

the other part felt somewhat sad that I wouldn't be sitting with them every morning for breakfast. The answer to my internal conflict was simple, I felt the sadness because

the three of us haven't been apart - apart from school. To be honest, I never thought any of us would last this long.

I just couldn't have been more relieved that my mom was at least in a stable state. She needed to be there for Charley. Especially since I couldn't be for the time being.

My suitcase dragged behind me as I walked. I could see a group of other soon-to-be-councelors. They were all huddled in circles, talking away, ignoring others. Awesome.

If I wanted to deal with cliques for another two months, I could've just stayed around home. I sighed. I guess there's no escaping people like this, no matter what. I didn't see

a point into pushing myself into a group, so I headed to a picnic table not too far away. I wasn't here to impress people. I was only here because of my mother. That was all.

Making friends wasn't on the agenda because I didn't find the point in befriended people I'd probably never see again. So, I sat down and placed my suitcase on the table top.

I couldn't stop myself from yawning.

Looking around I could tell that there would still be some time before we'd actually have to do anything. I crossed my arms on the table and laid down my head. My eyes

closely followed, falling closed almost instantly.

I was not sure how long I had been alseep before I heard , "Well, looks like someone's falling asleep on the job", I jumped. Shaken by the voice, I looked around and there

he was. A young man, probably about seventeen or eightteen. He had to be over 6 feet tall, with black hair and dark brown eyes that almost matched his hair. The shade of

his skin was a russet tan and he had a very well, muscular build. There were definitely not guys like this at home.

Lost in my mental notes, I forgot he was still standing there, now shaking his head. He sat down in the spot next to me. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. I was only

joking," he paused, probably to see if I'd respond. I didn't. "Well," he continued, " I had noticed everyone in groups, then seen you over here by yourself. I'm not much for

groups myself. Never was". He chuckled. "You don't talk much do you?", he asked. I looked him in the eyes, "I don't know. I guess I don't. I prefer to keep things to myself,

really", I shrugged. He flashed a brilliantly white smile, "I couldn't agree with you more". I could feel my cheeks heat up. I was 99.9 percent sure he could see my blush.

We sat in silence, looking around in different directions, trying not to make much eye contact. I turned to him. "So, what made you decide to come over here and talk to

me?". He turned and looked at me, "Why wouldn't I? Why wouldn't anyone want to come over and talk to you". I raised an eyebrow, "That doesn't exactly answer my

question...". He chuckled, "Okay, okay. I thought it would be nice to actually get to know one person while I'm stuck here in this Hell hole, right? Gotta make the best of

it". I looked at him, slightly surprised by his words. " I don't know if I really want to make friends. Not that I don't think you're nice, but why would you know _I'm_ a person

you'd want to be friend with...?". He brought his fingers to rest under my chin and lifted it up gently, "Well, I'm pretty sure I know now", he spoke and then stood up. He

turned over and nudged his head to where all the councelors were now forming a big group. Probably the introduction to the camp begining.

"Looks like we're missing out", he spoke.

I started to grab my suitcase off my the tabletop and looked back." Here, let me help you", he reached out and grabbed my suitcase for me. I was begining to think that

maybe these next two months really wouldn't be too horrible.

With that thought, I couldn't help but smile.


	6. You Had Me At Hello

**A/N: I'm so sorry the delay on this chapter! Everything has been hectic since after my last update.**

**I did want to say that I am thrilled about every single "Favorite Story" alert! I adore each and everyone of you.**

**Ok, ok. Now, my emotional-ness is done. Lets get on with the show!**

**I do NOT own aything Twilight, I just put the characters in my world.**

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><p>The next few weeks were, well, interesting. I had hung out with him every chance I had. Well, in between leading my group of campers to various activities. I didn't want to<p>

admit it, he was right. If we're here, we might as well get to know somebody.

We told each other all the basics about ourselves. I couldn't help but smile at how it all came about... 

"So, we've known each other for days now and you haven't even told me your name", I looked at lake as we sat on the beach. He layed back on to the sand, placing his arms

behind his head. "Well, you never asked. And you haven't even told me your name yet, either", he answered in a rebuttle and flashing a smile. "Okay, fair enough", I said, while

flicking a bit of sand playfully at him. He sat up,"How about on the count of three, we say our names at the same times?". "That works", I agreed. "Okay, now, ready? One, two,

three...Jacob", he started laughing. "Hey now, no fair. You didn't say yours". I rolled my eyes at his amusment,"Okay. Renesmee. My parents combined both of my

grandmothers' names together - Renee and Esme".

He stopped laughing and looked like he was thinking,"Renesmee's a pretty name. Pretty and original. Why were you so afraid to tell me it before?". I shrugged, "I just...it

would sound silly". Jacob chuckled. Jacob. I liked that name, it suited him nicely.

He broke my train of thought, and probably just n time because I was heading towards a daydream."Now, I doubt anything you have to say would be silly. Come on, tell

me. If it's _that _silly, which I doubt it is, I promise I won't laugh". I sighed, "Okay. I told myself I wouldn't get to close to anyone, because summer will end and so would any

friendship". He turned to me and looked serious,"Well, it would only have to end if you want it to. And who said I wanted to be _friends_, because honestly I think theres more

there". I turned to him in disbelief. Yeah, he has very straightforward from the get-go, but this...this was different. 

I was at a completely loss of words. Of course, I was very attrached to Jacob and everyday since I met him, part of me had wished there could be more. There just couldn't

be. I already pushed my lines back enough to let myself be friends with him. If I admitted to myself that being more than friends should happen... well, I'd only be setting

myself up for hurt. I didn't want that. Not after I watched it happen to my mother.

The sound of Jacob's feet moving on the sand stopped me there. He looked at me, shook his head and started to stand up. "You know Renesmee, for once why don't you

just say whats on your mind? It would make it so much easier", with that Jacob turned and walked towards the trail. I sat there on beach and watched him as he disappeared.

I knew in that moment, I didn't want t lose him.

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><p>Sleep. It was a joke. Something that mocked me, especially tonight. I kept replaying Bryson walking away. I kept picturing the look in his dark brown eyes, the way the<p>

breeze slightly moved his black hair. Sleep. It was something that I wouldn't be getting tonight. So, tonight I would just lay here, staring at the ceiling.

I forced my eyes closed countless times, but it was just a fail. I pulled the blanket around me tighter and curled myself up into a ball. Part of me wanted to cry, the other

part fought the tears. That part lost. I hadn't cried since my dad left a few years ago, but this was different. I felt horrible. There was no way I could wait until 9 a.m. to

talk to him, explain what I was trying to say. I couldn't.

I sat up on the bed, looked around the cabin, and the other councelor was dead asleep. I grabbed my hoodie, changed into my jeans and moved slowly out the door. I had

no idea what my plan was, I couldn't think of one either. The trail was dark, the breeze swayed the trees, causing some leaves to fall into it and make their way to the ground.

I was pretty sure I had found his cabin, if it wasn't his, then I was just about to make an idiot of myself. I grabbed an acorn from the trail and threw it at the first window

I could see on the cabin.

I stood in shock that I actually went through with this.

The time dragged on, but I was sure it had only barely been a minute. I could a faint light - from a lamp maybe- and I could see a shadow of a person on the wall. The

shadow moved towards the window. I held my breath. How could I not have thought of a plan, or at least something to say? I regreted that now. I couldn't really tell who was at

the window, but I could see it being opened. My mind told me to run away, but my heart told me to stay. I was too conflicted to move. The window was now opened all the way. 

This was it. 

"Renesmee, what do you want?", Jacob's voice carried down to where I stood. Good, it was him. But something told me it was only going to more difficult. I took a deep

breath.

"Jacob, I wanted to tell you", I paused to think. No, I wasn't going to think it through more, because that's what got me here in the first place. "to tell you whats on my

mind".

He didn't say anything, just stood by the window with his head stuck out. The light hit the back of him, creating a dark silloutte. "Aren't you going to say anything, Jacob ?"

And then something unexpected happened, he started laughing. Laughing, at me.

"Whats so funny ?". He forced himself to stop," That you walked all the way to my cabin at 3 a.m. to tell me that", chuckled again, "I knew I was right when I said that you

were the kind of person I wanted to meet".

The wind picked up, it felt like the temperature dropped 10, maybe 15 degrees instantly. My body reacted to the cold in shivers. "Well, I'm glad that you find it amusing,

I'm freezing, so I'm going to head back to my cabin", as I started to turn around he called out to me. "Ness, why don't you come inside for a while. I have a microwave, I could

make you a cup of hot cocoa to warm yourself up". The offer was very appealing, but I hesitated. "Yeah, but what if we get caught?". I didn't have to see to know that he smiled,

" You can be back before the counselors have to meet. It'll be fine". With that I walked up to the cabin door, where he stood waiting to open it for me, and let me in. 

The cabin was about the same size as mine, two beds as well, but the other looked unoccupied. "You have a cabin to yourself?", I asked him. He smiled, "Yeah, I do. It's nice, sometimes, and other times it gets lonely". He walked over to his bed and sat down.

"So, Renesmee, whats on your mind?". I knew this question was coming, and I felt embarassed. The things I wanted to tell him could ruin a lot and I didn't need that.

"I...I...", I thought about exactly what I wanted say, "Okay, but first I want to tell you that you asked, and I'm just answering your question". He looked at me, his deep eyes

gained a hint of sparkle when the lamp reflected off them. "I know I asked. And I promise, I will listen, not laugh and not run away...again",his words were soothing, a relief.

"Okay, Jacob, when you walked away earlier, it hurt. I felt like I was, well, losing our relationship, but of what I said, or lack there of. It hurt to lay in my bed tonight for hours,

not being able to sleep, thinking of you walking away. Thinking of the breeze moving your hair, or the way your eyes light up when you smile and -" before I could finish he

kissed me.

Every part of me felt different. Sure, I've had a kiss a guy before, but it was nothing in comparison to this. Part of me was shouting for joy, while the other told me to be

careful. I was too wrapped the moment, the way his lips moved, guideing mine. I didn't want this to end. Not now, not ever. But, he slowly pulled away, his breathing heavy. His

eyes met mine and he smile his gorgeous smile. "Wow", was the only word he spoke.

I started giggling and looked at him, he looked confused. "Now what?", I asked. He placed his fingers on my cheek and said, "I don't want this to end with summer. I've

never been any relationship like this, where I didn't want to find something else. Where I had everything I've always wanted". I stared into his eyes,"I know what you mean".

And he placed another, softer kiss on my lips.


	7. My Kind of Perfect

**A/N: So, two chapter in one day? Yes, it happened! Let me know what you think!**

**Reviews are _almost_ as amazing as Jacob's body ;)**

**I do NOT own Twilight, etc etc etc.**

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><p>Everything in the following weeks was easy, because for the first time, I didn't fight myself on wanting to be with Jacob. There was no point to anymore. The part that hurt was<p>

that camp was going to be over tomorrow, and we weren't sure how we were going to make this continue. But Jacob was determined and so was I.

I sighed.

We walked hand in hand down to the beach. The sun was just begining to set. It was simply breath taking. Not just the sunset, but spending my last few hours at camp

with him. I wasn't sure why I ever wanted to hold him, and any feelings I carried for him, at arms length away. Everything related to Jacob was just so irresistable. And I loved

every moment.

He layed out a blanket onto the sand, and we both sat down. His arms wrapped around me in an intimate, yet protective way. It killed me inside because I couldn't see what

it would be like without him in my life. There was no way to hold back the tears, as they made their down my cheek I pushed myself closer into his embrace. Jacob pulled back

slightly, enough to look at my face. "Why are you crying?", he looked as if seeing my tears had caused him pain. His lips touched the spot where my tears, just moments ago,

had fallen from. "There's no need to cry. If everything is meant to work out, it will. I have never felt this way for anyone in my life, so I know this **will** work out", Jacob lifted up

my chin and the way setting sun made his hair shine and his deep eyes sparkle even more.

I didn't know what had come over me, I had never done anything like this-or even remotely close to this- in my life. I pushed Jacob back onto the blanket, laying on top on him,

and kissed him like I would never be able to kiss those marvelous lips of his again. He never fought away, instead his strong, yet gentle, hands were placed on each of my hips. I

knew I couldn't let this moment end, not now, not ever. Because as much as he wanted to be optimistic, I had learned to never get my hopes up, unless I was one hundered

percent sure something would happen. His lips moved there way to my left ear, where they softly whispered in my ear, "I love you. Now and forver. _Always_". 

Jacob hesitated for a moment, the moment after I started pulling up his shirt. "We really shouldn't be doing this here...", he trailed off and my lips touched his neck. I tried to

use my most seductive voice, "Then where would this be better?". It took him a moment to answer, he probably couldn't think straight. "My cabin. Where no one can see us".

I sat up and he placed a hand on my cheek, "but only if you're one hundered percent. Please don't feel rushed because of me. I would wait for you forever". But I was one

hundered percent sure, about him. "I'm sure about you. I'm ready", and went to his lips for one more kiss before he picked me up and we walked back up to the trail. 

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><p>It had be sometime in the early morning, like early, early morning. I could seeb the sun barely peeking to rise, the colors of light not yet showing effect to the sky.<p>

I looked to Jacob next to me. He looked so peaceful, so...so...like he was lost in a dream. I couldn't help but smile.

I didn't move much, for two reasons. The first, Jacob had his arm around me and I didn't want to wake him. Secondly, I didn't want to lose this moment. I was always told

by my mom and the friends I had, that if you weren't ready, you'd regret it. Well, I didn't regret it. I didn't feel guilty. Simply, I felt happier than I had in a while, because Jacob

was the first person in years I didn't push away. 

The sun pushed itself up higher to rise, so our final moments were fast approaching. I knew we had to be by the cafateria hall by 9:30, and I assumed it was around 6 right now.

I leaned over and kissed him on the forehead, laid back and let my eyes fall close. There was no way I was rushing for time to be over. No way at all. 

My mind quickly took me to a replay of last night...

_ My heart was racing. Jacob set me down on his bed, while we both tugged away at _

_each others clothes. He paused right after his shirt was off. "Are you sure? We can stop now, _

_it's not too late and I won't be mad...", I pulled him down on top of me, where I hushed him _

_with my kisses._

_He moved his hands down to the bottom of my shirt and I helped him take it off me.  
><em>

_ The rest went by fast. We were two peices to a puzzle, a puzzle that had been broken __and all the pieces lost or scattered. Two pieces that finally found each other. Our bodies _

_together like one, moving in sync. Each of our heavy breaths blending with the others. __My hands gliding on his back, his arms. His hands moving their way all over; my hair, my _

_hands, my stomach, my hips, my legs..._

"Ness...Ness...goodmorning, beautiful", his voice soothed me. He turned the alarm clock on the wall. "We really should be getting ready...", but his words were not words I

wanted to hear. Reluctantly, I sat up, yawned, and saw his miraculous smiling face. He leaned forward, he stood next to the bed now clothed in his jeans and a shirt in hand,

and kissed me. I wanted to pull him back to bed, but I knew right now I couldn't...and I didn't know the next time I'd be able to again, either. 

Jacob pulled his shirt over his head and brought his attention back over to me.

"What's wrong? You regret having sex, don't you? I told you, you didn't have to becau-", I put one of my fingers up to his lips. "No, I don't regret having sex, I don't regret

anything. So, don't put any blame on yourself, you did nothing wrong. But I probably did...", as my sentence trailed off, he shook his head. "Renesmee, you did nothing wrong.

You...you were perfect", his fingers caressed my cheek. I looked into his eyes. "Jacob", I felt my tears begin to swell into my eyes," I don't want to leave you. I don't want to go

home. I haven't had enough time with you". 

That did it, my tears poured out and my face fell into his chest.


	8. What hurts the most, is being so close

We walked down the trail to the main area, hand in hand, at a pace so slow we pretty

much were dragging our feet on the gravel path. I could see through the corner of my eye

everytime he'd turn his head and look at me. I could swear he could hear my heart about to

tear through my chest. He smiled, nearly in sync with my thoughts and my body reactions.

I would miss this, everything about us, him and how I feel with him. I kept thinking that if

this was some type of teenage-angst movie, everything would be fine in the end...

obviously. But not before a very cheesy storyline. I smiled.

Jacob stopped walking, so of course I did, too. He scooped me up in his arms and

started to carry me as much of the way he could. Because one of the camp rules was no

romantic involovement, and very clearly, we broke that rule. For the last month or so. I was

never one for breaking rules, but in this scenario, I'd liked the rush. Because really, what

could they do? Send us home?

He slowed down his pace, and finally came to a standstill. "You know what I'm going

to miss most about this summer?", he looked down at me and asked. I shrugged. He set me

down to my feet and kissed me, more intense in passion than ever before. I could feel the

heat and electricity move through my body. My cheeks were surely red. He slowly pulled

back and he chuckled, then continued with his answer. "What I'll miss most is that, kissing

you. And more than that your reaction after", he brought a hand to gently carress my cheek,

"like your blushing". I gave me a soft peck on the lips and we walked the last eighth of a mile

walking side by side looking like friends, nothing more and certianly nothing less.

The car ride home was excructiating. I had no need to talk, but my mom kept asking

me questions. One of her favorite questions, "Who was that cute guy that came up and said

goodbye to you?". I would've loved to tell her, but honestly I could already feel my anxiety

setting in. I didn't know how Jacob and I were going to get through this seperation.

As I pulled myself back into the reality that was this car ride, my mom kept turning

to look at me. "Honey, whats wrong? I'm sorry if my questions are upsetting you...", she

trailed off as she drew her attention back to the road, as she should be. I shook my head.

"Mom, your questions aren't upsetting me. Its just that I...its nothing", as mush as I

wanted to tell her more about Jacob, how his eyes would seem to sparkle at sunset,

how his smile was a knockout, how he loved me for me, how just simply amazing he was.

Mom sighed. "Its about him isn't it? The guy who came up to you and said goodbye?",

she asked me, well she kind of already had an idea. "Sweetheart, I've been there. Its

summer love, its great, its romantic. But at the end of summer, someone ends up

heartbroken", she turned quickly to look at me, but then turned back to the road

twice as fast. "Mom, its not like that. He's an amazing guy, I don't regret meeting him.

He was there when I needed a friend and didn't leave my side... I know it was only

summer, but I really do love him". Mom sighed again. No one said another word for

the rest of the ride home.


	9. There's No Turning Back Now

3 weeks, 5 days, 7 hours and 23 1/2 minutes. That was how long since I had last seen Jacob. His beautiful eyes, that inviting smile, the warm comforting arms around me.

I felt completely and utterly alone.

My mom would ask me everyday, "Renesmee, are you alright?". She told me I looked sicked, almost like I had given up. Believe me, I hadn't given up yet, and I wasn't

about to let myself, either. I knew someday I'd see him again, if he came to me once, he'd come to me again.

Mom stared at me from across the table with a sadden expression. I didn't want to hurt her, but I couldn't pretend to be happy if I wasn't, and trust me I wasn't.

Charley sighed loudly and began to break the silence. "So, tomorrow school starts back up. Are you excited, being a senior and all?". I looked at her and couldn't help but

slightly smile. My sister Charley was so sweet and innocent and naive. Thats the way I hoped it would stay. I shrugged my shoulders in response to her question. "I don't

know, I guess. It's just another year to me. How about you, though? Freshman year, exciting stuff". She turned her face to look back down to her plate. "I'm nervous. What

if I get lost, or an upperclassmen puts me in a trashcan or something? I've seen the movies. It's scary stuff!". I couldn't help but burst out laughing, neither could mom.

Charley scoffed at both of us and stomped upstairs to her room. The door slammed on cue.

And for the first time in nearly a month, I was distracted from the haunted thoughts of not seeing Jacob.

* * *

><p><strong>3 weeks, 6 days and 17 hours.<strong>

The first day of senior year. No matter what I told my sister, I still had nerves. It was only natural, it was after all the first day of senior year. The year, as I was told and had

seen in movies, that would define everything. I felt sick to my stomach. My hand grabbed my stomach and I ran to the bathroom. It hit me, like a semi-truck to hit a

pedestrian to walk in the road just at the wrong moment. I clutched onto the toliet and it felt like I was vomiting my guts out.

I could her footsteps stop at the door, I couldn't look to see if it was mom or Charley, but honestly I didn't care.

As soon as I could contain myself, I went back to my room to check my calander. I fumbled back and forth between July, August and September, going through the days,

counting again and again. There was no lying to myself, I was 2 weeks late.

I wasn't exactly sure what to think, but I slid down to the floor, wrapping my arms around my legs. I needed to hold myself together, now more than ever, to figure out whats

going on. One thing I couldn't deny was that now I really, really needed Jacob. Someone was knocking on my door. "Renesmee, Renesmee! Are you alright?", mom continued

to pound her fist on my bedroom door. "Ness, open the door now!". I managed to stand myself up, wipe away my tears - I don't even remember when I started crying-

walked over to my door to open it. There was my mom, she looked confused, worried and mad all in one package. She sighed.

"Ness, sweetheart, are you okay? Are you sick? Charley said she seen you vomiting... maybe I shouldn't have attempted to make that new recipe last night for dinner...", she

trailed off and I cut in. "Mom, I'm fine. I just want some privacy to get ready for school", she nodded. "Okay", she leaned forward and kissed my forehead. As soon as she

walked out of my room, my mind went in directions of all the possibilities of being two weeks late. The first, stress. I was feeling under stress. Second, weight gain, but that

ones less likely because I haven't gained enough to mess with my cycle. Third, I could be pregnant.

I thought on the word. _Pregnant.  
><em>

I flopped back onto my bed, closed my eyes and let my memory take me through all the details of that night.

* * *

><p>I hadn't quite realized that I fell back alseep. Well, not until my mom was pounding on my door. Again. I already knew I'd be late for school, I was late for a lot of things these<p>

days... Mom opened my bedroom door and without hesitation, starting yelling at me to hurry up. I honestly had no want or need to be at school today. To face everyone, to

tell about my 'horrible turned amazing, turning into a surpirse'. I sighed and somewhere in- between my sigh, I started crying and mom was at my side. I could feel my

mother's arms wrap around me, to comfort me and protect me. Like mothers do. I wanted so desperately to just tell her what was going on, but I couldn't find the words. I

don't think there are any words for a situation like this...well, aside from the obvious.

Mom kissed me lightly on the forehead and spoke these words. "Darling, you can tell me anything. Anything at all. I may be hesitant to hear them, but I'd rather hear the

truth than a lie to spare my feelings. I know you love him, and I mean this when I say this, if its meant to be than it will be". With that she pulled me in closer,"for today and

today only I will let you stay home, you don't seem well and I know you'll catch up on all your work, so for today just rest", she started releasing her arms," I'm going to take

Charley to school and I'll be back home soon". She then kissed my forehead, walked towards the door, and through my periphial vision, I could she her look back. She was

worried, but not for the same reasons I was.

As soon as she was fully out of sight, I huddled back under my blankets and cried

myself back to sleep.

_I wasn't quite sure what time it was or if I was even awake, or if this could be some crazy dream. A baby's cry broke my train of thought. It was a dream. The maternal side of _

_me jumped out of bed, rushed down the hall to the nursery, to comfort my baby, to help calm its little fears. I reached my door in one leap, looked back and could still see me _

_laying on my bed, sheltered under the fortess of covers._

_Impossible, I was standing my at the door trying to go to my crying little one. Or at least my maternal side was._

_I could hear a voice yelling to me from down the hallway, clearly my mom. I could hear her saying," You wanted to have this child but yet you let the poor thing cry, and cry. _

_Thats not what a mother does". A door slamming followed, and a few seconds my baby's crying has subsided._

* * *

><p>I leaped up out of bed. Two thirty p.m. In a few hours it will have been a month. Since I've seen him, held him, seen his smile. I could feel a pain shoot to my heart. If this was going to happen, I'd need him. Our child would need his or her father. I could in no way do this all by myself.<p> 


	10. A Moment Like This

**A/N: Sorry this took so long to get up. Things have been...not so great lately. Anyway, I really don't want to dwell on that, so please enjoy the next few chapters!**

**I don't own Twilight, all Characters are to their respective owner...etc,etc,etc.**

* * *

><p>Today, I actually got fully ready for school. Senior year. Homecoming, prom, new beginings. I never thought my new begining would behold the possibility of becoming a<p>

mother. But the things you expect rarely happen, I should know this by now.

I kept my look to the bare basics. Getting dressed in jeans, a t-shirt and a zip-up hoodie. I didn't even bother to straighten my hair, I kept it natural. I didn't feel the need for

make-up, but mom insisted on mascara, blush and lipgloss, at least.

I felt like I was putting up a fake act for everyone. That everything was fine. That I was getting over Jacob. That my heart was healing... thats exactly what was I doing. I was

in no way healed. He would be a permenant mark in my life. I'd see him in our child. I couldn't bare to hold this all in anymore. It was too much...

I looked to mom as we headed out to the car. "Mom, can you make me a doctors appointment?". She looked confused. "Why, sweetie? Are you okay?", she stroked her hand

on my cheek, "Okay, how about this, wait a few more days and if you don't better, I'll gladly take you. I promise".

I could only give a small nod.

The rest of the ride was quiet. Oddly enough, it reminded me much of the ride to camp and back home. My family never was one for many words. The talker was dad, but

since he left things have been too quiet. Its not something you get used to really...

As soon as we arrived outside the high school, I didn't hesitate to get out of the car at the first chance. I barely muttered out "goodbye" to my mom. Charley had to sprint to

catch up to me. "You know Ness, you could've at least waited for me", she said to me when she finally reached my side. "Sorry", was all I could say.

She began to tell this story.

"Renesmee, so theres this really cute senior guy. Someone in my english class said he's new. I can't quite remember his name, but I think it was something with a J. Jack?

Jacob? Either way he has a great smile and really dark eyes", she smiled. "He sounds kind of like the guy you met at that camp. Maybe he can help you take your mind of

him..." she nearly sang the last sentence. I sighed. A thought came to my mind. _Wouldn't it be funny if it was J__acob. My Jacob. With the smile I love. The guy I love._

But I hardly find that possible.

For the rest of the day I told myself it wasn't possible, but I couldn't quite convince myself of that. At lunch I sat with a few friends. I felt bad that keeping in contact over the

summer didn't work out, but they understood the summer camp thing. 

They started up a conversation about classes yesterday, which was the first day and the day I stayed wrapped in my covers crying. Miranda, who I had only known since ninth

grade, directed the conversation to the new guy. She said that his name was indeed Jacob and that he was "gorgeous". My mind rolled through the possibilities of it being

him, again. Maybe it really could be.

I hadn't paid much attention, but I guess Nicolette, one of the girls I'd known since junior high, asked me if I had seen him yet. I snapped back into reality and asked any-

thing I could think of. None of them knew much other than, the already stated, he was hot, and new to the school. It was enough information, really, but as soon as the

lunch dismissal bell rang, I darted from the cafeteria. I knew if I was ever going to see him again, I had to try and see if all this was true. I moved through the hallways, my

sister was trying to stop me to tell me something, but I wasn't stopping.

Thats when it hit me, there he was. My Jacob. He dropped one of his books, leaned down to pick it up, and as he stood back up, he looked at me. I tried to smile, but I think I

made a lame attempt. He dropped his books, again, and walked towards me, pushing through the kids moving though the hallway. Thats when he was in front of me, looking

at me with his dark brown eyes.

I thought I was going to pass out.

He placed his hands, one on each side of my face. For what seemed to be an enternity, we just looked at each other. His hands never left my face. He looked at me as if I

wasn't real, and I wasn't sure myself if he was. Hell, this could be some really messed up dream.

Jacob leaned closer his lips mere centimeter from my own and whispered,"This is a dream. It has to be..."

Without hesitation he kissed me. Right there. In the middle of the hallway. Not exactly the most romantic, but I didn't care. I had him again. Maybe everything would fall

back into place.

But, that usually wasn't how my life worked out.

* * *

><p><strong>So yeah, pretty much just fluffy stuff for this chapter. Things will get more tense as the chapters progress.<strong>

**Here's a general outline of whats to come in the next few chapters [its very general, I cant give anything away, can I? ;) ]**

**-Ness & Jake catch up on all the stuff thats happened since camp ended.**

**-Bella meets Jake.**

**-The doctors appointment that could change their lives...forever.**

**-Ness meeting Jakes parents.**

**The rest you'll have to follow the story for, but all that ^ will be spread amoungst the next 5-6 chapters. **

**Anyway, reviews are lovely.**


	11. The Truth

I had tweleve missed calls from my mom, which means that theres tweleve angry voicemails along with them. But at this moment, I didn't care. Jacob was back in my life

and that was one battle that I had myseteriously won. There were so many things I needed to ask him. So many things to tell him.

We went to this little restaruant. It seemed so familar to me, though I couldn't quite put my finger on why. We were directed to a table in a corner, the quieter side

of the place, as I could tell. I hesitated on to why where the start the conversation. Clearly, I needed to tell him I could be pregnant, and yes, with his child. Our child,

I shall say. I would tell him, but I could feel the loss of time, the awkwardness of being in his presence.

It felt like that first day all over again. I sighed.

He exhaled. "So, I'm more than sure that you're curious as to how I transferred to your school. Well, honestly, I didn't know it was your school. Shortly after I arrived home

my parents told me we were moving, they didn't say where to, but that we were because my dad's job was tranferred to a town near here. I actually thought that by moving

we may never find each other again. But, like I told you at camp, if fate wants it to happen, then happen it shall ". He smiled. That knock dead, goregous smile. I missed it.

I missed the way it made me feel short of breath, my heart racing, the electricity surging through me. I wanted his touch. He looked at me closely. "So, how about you?".

I thought on the statement for a moment. Where to even start? Not much had happen. Yes, yes, the pregnancy, but I didn't know if I should tell him now though. We

finally had just met back up after a long month of seperation. Uncertainty of the possibility of even seeing each other again. Was this really the appropriate time? But

was there ever an appropriate time? I could feel his hand rest on mine, caressing it in a comforting way. "It's alright. I understand", he spoke.

I didn't want to just sit in silence, but being in his presence said more than words could. He was here now. My Jacob was back with me. Everyday, I'd see him and know

that he wouldn't be going anywhere. But part of me would always fear he would. I was mad at myself for being such a pessimist.

I looked him in the eyes. His dark brown eyes. I took a deep breath. "No. I don't think you do understand". He looked confused, but how else would he look? He didn't know

how it felt when I first suspected I was pregnant, how I thought I may never see him again or how I'd have to go through this alone. Honestly, I don't know if he should feel

that kind of pain. No one should feel the pain of loneliness. I took a deep breath. "Jacob, I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant".

Well, there goes perfect timing.

He looked like he didn't know what to say, his face looked jumbled in expressions. "Wait,huh? Are you sure? How did it...happen?", he asked me the very typical questions.

I almost wanted to laugh, but it wasn't an appropriate time to do so.

"Well, I'm almost two months late, vomiting every morning, so yes, I'm pretty sure. As for how it happened, well we did have sex. I don't remember if you used any

protection or not, a fault on my part", every word I said seemed to have a defensive edge to it. It wasn't a purpose thing, but when I get upset, I get defensive.

He started to chuckle. "I'm sorry, that was a dumb question to ask. I wouldn't doubt you if you said you were pregnant. But have you been to the doctors...?"

I shook my head. "No, I haven't even told my mom yet, because I wanted to take a test. You know, to be for sure before I make an appointment". Jacob smiled and

held my hands in his.

"Well, no matter what, we're together now and thats the way its going to stay. I will not stray from your side ever again", he kissed my forehead.

I couldn't help but smile. At least I knew I had one person by my side through this, if it does happen to be the case. "Thank you. Thats all I wanted to hear".

* * *

><p>We pulled up into my drive way. It was now 7 p.m. and I knew once I walked through that door all hell would break lose. I had twenty-three missed calls from my mom<p>

and the same in voicemails. I didn't want her to be worried, that was the last thing I wanted to do. Especially after my dad leaving and all...

Jacob broke the silence. "Maybe I should walk you up to the door. It is the gentle- men thing to do-" I cut him off. "No, I don't think thats a great idea tonight. She's going

to be pissed off at me and its not fair to have you hear that", I leaned closer to him to kiss him.

His lips met mine. Strong, yet gentle. A movement so insync, that it was hard to tell whose lips were whose. It was just like the first kiss on the beach...

We broke apart at the same time and I could see him smile. "Thats on the list of things I missed". I smiled back and whispered, "Same".

I leaned away opened the door and for a moment thought about how it felt to be away from him, but he was here now and that wouldn't happen again. He swore upon it,

and so did I.

I opened the car door and moved slowly to the path that led to the front door. I feared opening that door. But now wasn't the time to be a coward, I needed to be strong.

For all I knew, I was going to be a mother shortly after graduation. I couldn't be afraid of anything or anyone anymore. It was time to either sink or swim. I was going to tell

my mom...

I sat on the couch, Charley sat next to me and mom decided to stand. Not a good sign.

"You know Renesmee Carlie, when you didn't come out to the car after school or answer my calls, I thought something horrible had happened to you! I was a nervous

wreck! I know you'll be eightteen in a few weeks, but that doesn't give you a free pass to run off with friends and not tell me anything about it. I'm still your mother and

you're still my child, like it or not", she looked as if she was about cry, shaking her head from side to side. "Don't do it again. Because if you do...I don't think I could handle

it", with that she started to walk off.

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and the words just came pouring out. "Mom, I think I'm pregnant". She turned around, her face furious, shocked, everything I suppose.

I couldn't take back telling her, it had to be done anyway.

She looked at me. "Is this some joke, Renesmee? Because I don't find it funny".

I could feel the first tears start to make their way down my cheek. Mom just stood there, staring down at me, waiting for my answer. Honestly, what would I say? Of

course being pregnant is no joke, I'm not that ridiculous.

"Well, Ness, we need to talk about this. I have to know somethings," she took a deep breath, closing her eyes while she did so. Just like I do, I see where I get it from.

Charley's hand rested on my arm in a comforting manner. Unlike mom, she had her suspicions. My sister was too keen for her own good.

I sighed. "What do you want to know?".

Mom took a seat on my other side on the couch. Even if I wanted to try and get up, there was no way I could. She looked at me. "For starters, who's the father? Is it-",

I cut her off, "Jacob, yes". She looked slightly confused, trying to remember. "The guy from the camp...?", I nodded.

All along, she probably knew it would be some tragic love story.

Mom put her head in her hands, as she mumbled the words,"Are you even going to see him again?". Charley giggled, it wasn't the time or place for any type of laughter,

and mom shot her a warning glance. She stopped herself and looked at our mom.

"Mom, he goes to our school, now".

She looked surprised, then a grin came upon her face. "So, you think that now everything is going to be all happy and work out fine? That he'll always love you? Is that

what you think Ness? Because you couldn't be more wrong", mom stood up, placing herself right in front of me. "This will not turn out to be some happy dream. Teenage

pregnancy is not some fairytale dream, where you'll ride off into the sunset", she took small gasps of air, her eyes red with tears starting to arise. She fell to her knees,

took my hands in hers. "Please, Renesmee, listen to me. Don't have your head up in the clouds. I did, once upon a time, and look where I am now? Two great daughters

and a husband who left with no warning. This is not what you want", her voice broke off from her crying. I wanted to cry with her, but I couldn't. I felt somewhat betrayed.

She honestly believed that Jacob would leave like dad did.

Jacob wasn't dad, he was better.

I couldn't think of anything to say to her, so I got up from the couch, broke free from my mom and Charley, and went into my room where I wrapped myself in my blankets

and cried myself to sleep. Like I had for the last and a half. And I thought would finally change.

My eyes opened around 9 a.m., and for five minutes I hesitated as to go downstairs or not. I thought about calling Jacob, being I had his new number. But it wouldn't be

fair to him to have him around the chaos occuring at my house - even thought most of it started because of me confessing of my pregnancy, which I didn't do by myself.

I sighed in fustration.

The faint sound of footsteps coming from down the hall kept getting louder. I prayed it wasn't my mom, only because I didn't need her lectures right now, I needed her

help. The whole argument last night only made me that much more confused. I only knew one thing at this point, I was definitely unsure about anything anymore.

A knock on my door interupted my thought. Instinctively, I pulled the covers back over my head. I listened as the door creaked slowly open and the footsteps approched

my bed. I could feel the spot next to me sink as someone sat down. They let out a heavy sigh. It was definitely my mother. She tugged back my blankets and shook her

head. "What are we going to do, Renesmee?", her voice sounded stressed.

I squeezed my eyes tighter and shook my own head to her question. "Mom, its not what _we're_ going to do, its what_ I'm _going to do", I sat up and looked at her.

"No, Ness, we're in this together. But if you insist, then what are you going to do?", she questioned me, I could tell she barely slept, the dark circles under her eyes were visible. She yawned.

"I'm keeping it. I'm keeping our baby".


	12. Here We Go Again

My hands were clammy. I haven't been this nervous in a long time.

Every possible scenario of the meeting with my mother and Jacob played through my mind. Over and over again. The possible outcomes made me flinch. I was ninety-nine

percent sure that my mom was going find every possible reason, beside from the possible pregnancy, to not even try to like him.

But maybe I'm wrong... too bad I can not even convince myself that.

I paced back and forth along the floorspace in front of my bed. My nerves were getting worse as the last five minutes of waiting for him were approching.

Charley pushed open my bedroom door and sat down on the right coner of my bed. She giggled lightly and shook her head. I turned towards her and tried my best to make

an angry face. She nearly fell off the bed laughing.

I sighed. "Charley, do you mind telling me why your laughing at me?", I asked her, raising an eyebrow.

She composed her self and smiled. "Ness, I think you're just worrying yourself over nothing. I honestly don't think mom will be _that_ bad, but yet again what do I know? I'm

just a young, naive fourteen year old", she told me sarcasticaly.

Charley gave me a brilliant smile, it reminded me of mom's, when she was still happy.

She grabbed my hand and lead me to my vanity mirror - I didn't use it often, but mom insisted that both of us girls have one- and started running a brush through my hair.

A soft smile lit up her face. "Whats so funny?", I asked her.

She shrugged her shoulders."It's just that I've been so jealous of your hair. It's so pretty, but of course I have the bad end of the genetics", she ended her statement with a

small chuckle.

I sighed. "Charley, you're beautiful. Don't ever doubt that. If ever tells you your not, then they're jealous", I looked at her in the mirror. She frowned. I didn't understand, I

was simply in a situation where I shouldn't be envied by my younger sister. She should see my life in a spiral and stay away from sex. Forever.

I could see my bedroom open in the reflection of the mirror and my mom appeared.

She looked to be trying her best to keep her pissed off look on. "Girls, Jacob's here. So, finish up and lets get this evening on the road".

All the panic came back. I just prayed that this evening wouldn't end in a death.

_Or two._

Charley lead the way down the stairs, I could tell she was just about as anxious as I was at this point. And that was pretty bad. I needed one person that wouldn't want

to kill either Jake or myself tonight, and Charley was that person.

The thought of my father came into my mind. If he was still around he was sure to be beyond disappointed. And I was pretty sure Jake would not be alive at this moment.

Maybe.

She made it to the bottom step as I collected my emotions. I knew my hormones would be all over the map soon, but I didn't realize I'd feel like crying, yelling and several

other things all at once right now. I was only about eight weeks.

We walked to the living room together. At this moment I couldn't be happier that I had my sister. Before the last ten steps to the entry of the living room, I stopped. Charley

stopped too, looked up at me, smiled and grabbed my hand with a light reassuring squeeze. I sighed, knowing it was now and well, there was no never. It was just now. I

kept repeating that to myself, over and over again.

Mom was in the armchair, with the ottoman pushed aside, her arms crossed and a very warning-like look on her face. I seriously thought I felt my heart fall into my stomach -

if it were plausible. I turned to see Jacob sitting on the couch, looking somewhat awkard and uncomfortable. I couldn't blame him.

He gave me a smile trying to relieve my worry. I wonder if he knew it wasn't all that convincing. He probably did.

Charley walked over towards mom, as she did, nudging me to go sit by Jacob. I swear, I kept telling my feet to move, but they simply wouldn't proceed forward.

Mom gave me a questioning, confused look, as she began to shift forward from her chair to stand. I shook my head. "Mom, I'm fine. Theres just so much going on...", at

that I let my sentence trail off, and Mom relaxed back into her seat.

I finally convinced my foot to proceed towards the couch. Jacob gave me his signature smile-which makes me lose my train of thought, quite frequently- and I sat down in

the spot next to him.

I could feel the tension building all around the room. If I could, I'd dismiss Charley, I just didn't see why she had to put through this right now. Oh, yeah. She was keeping

mom from committing any crimes she may regret later. The seconds kept ticking on, no one spoke a single word. I could feel mom's look burning a whole through my

forehead at this very moment. Was I supposed to break the ice?

Someone cleared their throat. _Finally._

It appeared that Jacob was taking the plunge. "Your home is very lovely, Mrs. Cullen. Very welcoming. I do thank you for the invitation for dinner-", my mother cut him off

right there.

"Jacob, enough with the sweet talking. We're not all here for you to charm your way into good graces. No, we're here to learn more about who you are as a person, your

family, life goals...and most importantly, what you and my daughter plan on doing".

I opened my mouth to begin talking, but mom was having it. "Don't Renesmee. Now, she's already told me what she'd like to do, if it does up come up truely positive, but

what about you, Jacob? A young man, so very young, settling down with a girl and child?". She stopped and turned all eyes on him.

Jacob was finally feeling the pressure. He'd have to get used to it if this was happenning. I could see a little bead of sweat roll down the side fo his head.

"Mrs. Cullen, I want every oppertunity to do everything possible for my child. Everything. Getting up at 3 am, singing silly songs, all the firsts, forts made of sheets in the

living room, helping with homework, teaching them how to ride a bike...everything".

Mom's expression softened, just ever so slightly. But I knew her, she wasn't going to drop her ground too easily.

"Well, Girls, Jacob, why don't we go ahead and take this conversation to the table. Dinner should be about ready".

As I walked past my mom, she didn't take her eyes off me. Her face reflected that worry. I knew everything Jake said was everything dad did for us. But He and Dad

were to completely different people.

Jake wouldn't make dad's mistakes, he'll make his own.

I knew now she had this feeling I was falling right down her path. The path of being loved, being graced with the greatest love and then being left broken and alone...

* * *

><p><strong>AN: So, theres another chapter down, with a little more complication added. **

**Please feel free to review. OH! While you're at it, go ahead and let me know if you think it should be a boy or girl. I have the whole story written out but I left the sex of the baby and the name out to go back and fill in later...So, go ahead readers, tell me your pick & a name you'd like for the future little one.**


	13. Everything Changes

Dinner wasn't even a tenth as bad as I would've thought.

Fortunately, mom was actually listening to Jacob's answers to her questions. But thats

my mom for you; tough exterior, soft heart. She'd always say,"Once the daughter of a police

chief, always the daughter of a police chief". It was completely obvious with her

interrogation, as well.

"Jacob, tell me a little about your parents. What are their names and what is it that

they do for a living?", my mom looked across the table directly at Jacob, as she asked.

"Well, my dad's name is William Black, but everyone calls him Billy. Mom's name is

Sarah", Jacob replied.

Mom nodded for him to continue with the next part of her question.

"Dad's an accountant and his company transferred him here to help out with the

business and financial plan for this new assignment. Mom does, or used to, part time

catering. For the local events in our old town".

Mom looked content with his response. She took a drink of her water and then

continued to proceed. "Where is it that your moved from?".

"Well, I was born and raised in Seattle, but for a short time we lived in Port Angeles

to help out my grandparents".

The questions were basic, almost too easy and too expected.

"Jacob, have you ever been with sexually active with anyone else besides my daughter?"

"Mom, stop!"

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen, that is enough! Jacob, please answer my question".

This wasn't just embarassing, this was mortifying. And it wasn't even me that was be

glared down by my mother for an answer.

But, even if I'd never admit it, I was genuinely curious.

Jacob took a deep breath and answered, "Yes".

The next questioned was not asked by mom, by myself.

"When Jacob and who was she?"

Another deep breath. " It was shortly after I turned 16. She was a year ahead of me in school,

and I had a crush on her that entire school year. It was a coincidence that we were at the

same end of the school year party. We were both drinking some and ran into each

other...the rest is obvious, Ness, please don't make me say it. It doesn't even matter. She

used me".

Pain. I could see it. His eyes told me everything. I had no idea if he was still hurt over her.

But he wasn't the only one who has been hurt by someone in the last two years.

We could move past this. We had each other.

That had to account for something.

THREE WEEKS LATER...

Today is the begining of October, the day of my appointment. Everything I had been

suspecting in the last 5 weeks would be either confirmed of denied. But I knew it would be

the ealier of the options, I could feel it.

You know. You just feel it.

Charley begged and begged mom for her to come along. She was actually exicted and

supportive of me and Jacob. Mom on the other hand, just learned to deal with the hands

dealt.

Jacob came over to the house two hours before the appointment. He seemed

nevous, anxious...and I couldn't place what else. He jsut worried me so much sometimes. I

just need him so much.

"Ness, I have a question for you"

"Okay?"

"Would you want to have dinner at my house tomorrow night? My parents are

looking forward to meeting you".

I smiled. They actually wanted to meet me. Either that or Jacob was trying to

waterdown the truth. I really need to stop thinking the worst.

"Sure, Jake. That sounds nice", giving a kiss on the cheek.

He smiled. My heart skipped a few beats. "Great".

We heard footsteps approch the room. Mom stepped in the frame of the door. "Come

on guys, lets get going. You don't want to be late Renesmee".

The drive the office was quiet. Too quiet. I didn't like it, but I sure as hell was not

going to be the one to break the silence. When we arrived, I ran out of the car...if thats

possible.

After signing in, paper work, waiting to be called back, I was finally in the room where

I'd learn the truth. No, I mean we. Yes, we. It wasn't just me anymore. I had a whole support

system of the three most amazing people in my life.

A knock on the door and Doctor Weber stepped in the room. She seemed nice,

genuinely caring. I looked over to mom and she patted my knee. She thought it, too.

Doctor Weber set up the ultra sound machine, cover my stomach with this cold blue

gel and I felt my heart beat seven times fast.

But how was I able to hear it?

Dr. Weber looked to me and said," Congratulations, Miss Cullen, you're nine weeks along".


	14. Not One, but Both of Us

_Two weeks later..._

It's been two weeks since we've seen the first ultrasound. I'm 11 weeks. It's still the

strangest thing trying to register theres a little person growing inside of you. Strange, yet

awfully amazing.

I looked in the mirror on the back of my door, turned to the side and just stared at the

just noticable bump begining to appear. I was blown away at how fast time was going by. By

all means, I still had another 29 weeks to go, it's just in that moment I knew it was happening

faster than any of us realize.

And there was still so much to do.

Mom finally built up everything she had to contact Grandpa Carlisle and Grandma

Esme. I told them what was going on. I was deathly afraid of disappointing them, but I was

well assured that they'd always be there to help me, and us, and that they wanted sonogram

pictures. I could feel my heart inflate in my chest, with all love that my distant family was

showing me. They never stopped loving me, loving us, after all.

Of course, the one person wanted to be around support me through this as well, was

nowhere to be heard of...

Jacob did everything he could to get me to his parents house for dinner. He was

worried, he wasn't sure how they'd take it. Reguardless, tonight was the night we'd tell them.

Everything else would go from there.

Simply put, I was a nervous wreck. Mom and Charley spent the afternoon with me trying to

be a distraction and help me get ready. Any excuse for 'Girl Time', I suppose. Hair, nails,

make-up, picking out my clothes. But it was really nice to have them holding me up. They

were everything.

I face back forward to the mirror, tugged my shirt back into proper place and grabbed my

purse. Mom wanted me to meet her over in her room for some last minute words of adivce.

I needed every bit I could get. I mean, my mother -the calm, collected one- even freaked out

for the first week or two. Who knew what would go on with the Blacks.

As I knocked on her door, I could see it was already just ever so slightly open. Mom was

sitting on her bed, looking through one of the old pictures albums. I hadn't seen those in

years, but I knew they had a purpose for them to be out.

The door moved open just enough for mom to notice. "Come on in, Ness. I have

something I want to show you", she called out to me. I made my way into the room, as I

walked over to her, I could see her smile grow. "Honey, you look beautiful. Come, sit down

with me". So, I did. She patted the spot closer to her, so I scooted over. Before I knew it, she

moved the album halfway onto my lap so I could look at it as well. The picture I was looking at

was my mother. Her dark brown hair over her left shoulder in a braid, brown eyes with that

sparkle - Charley's get the same way- and dressed in a light blue shirt that hugged her

pregnant stomach. I could immediately tell the background. There was no way you could

mistaken the clean, crisp white walls, adorned with classy painting and a mixture of family

portaits. The Cullen home. I could turned the page to see mom alongside with a face I haven't

seen since I was at least ten years old - Aunt Alice.

Small, pixie-like, shopaloholic Aunt Alice.

I closed the album. What was the point of bringing up these things that were about to make

me cry?

I turned to mom and she embraced me into a hug. She began stroking my hair.

She hasn't done that in years.

"Ness, do you know why I got out this album?", she asked in her soothing voice.

Brushing away tears, "No".

She let out a deep breath. "I don't know if you know, but I was eighteen when I became

pregnant with you". No, I didn't know that.

She waited for my response, but I kept quiet for her to continue.

"Your father and I were married two months after we graduated high school. I mean, yes we

were young, but we had been dating close to two years. A month or two after I moved to

Forks with Charlie. We were young, but old souls. I knew I found 'The One', so when your

father proposed, I said yes. It was a beautiful wedding, you've seen some of the pictures,

right?", I nodded. "It was like out of a little fairytale. Your grandparents and Aunt Alice

arranged our honeymoon on this beautiful little island, which coincidently, your Grandpa

Carlisle bought for Esme. It was perfect. About six weeks after we returned home, everything

began to click and I found out I was pregant with you".

She reached for the album and opened to the page containing a picture of a little baby girl. A

head full of copper ringlets, golden brown eyes and a little dimpled smile.

"You were the most amazing baby I could've ever asked for. And after you I never thought I

would've been blessed with Charley. I counted myself a lucky woman. Even now, I'm lucky".

She smiled at me. "Moral of the story, I want you to choose your path. To create your own imperfect fairytale. I just want you to be happy".

I could feel the tears begining to swell up again. _Damn pregnancy hormones and overly-_

_emotional mother-daughter moments._

Mom handed me a tissue and we started laughing. "When I was pregnant with you, I

guarantee I ten times worse. I couldn't even finish a conversation without crying over

something. Hormones suck, don't they?".

I wiped away the remaining tears and turned to mom. "His parents won't be as supportive as

you are, I can just feel it. The Blacks are well-known family. Did you know Jake's great-

grandfather was the Chief of the Quillette tribe in La Push? What is this going to mean to his

family?".

Mom shook her head. "Renesmee, it doesn't matter what they think. Jacob is eighteen and

you will be as well next fall. You're adults. Your choice is all you. It has nothing to do with me,

Charley or Billy and Sarah Black". She brought her hand to my cheek. "I'll always be there for

you. I'm your mother. Someday, you'll understand what I mean with this little one".

She looked over to the clock on her nightstand and turned back to me.

"Well, look at the time. I'm sure Jacob is due here any minute now. Why don't we go

downstairs with Charley now? I'm sure she wants to you for a bit before you leave".

I got off of my spot on the bed and made my way to the door.

_Jacob,_ _I wish I was strong enough to lift not one, but both of us. _

_Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one, but both of us._


	15. I Did It For You

**A/N: I'll make this quick. Everyone thank you for the new alerts. Favorite author, favorite story...honestly, when I went through my email and had seen those I was speechless. It's truly wonderful.**

**I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

* * *

><p>With his shaky hand, Jacob held it out for me as he opened my car door. This was it- the moment of truth. Well, that wouldn't be a first for us. <p>

The entire ride over to the Blacks' home - or should I say mansion- was in silence. What could either of us say anyway, right now? There was too much on my mind, so I knew Jake's was ten time worse. It didn't mater that his parents couldn't do anything, it was jsut the fact that he wanted their acceptance. But, me as the pessimist that I am, knew better than that. 

Hand in hand, he lead me up the lighted walkway. His hand was slightly trembling, as was mine, and I wanted nothing more than for once to tell him it was going to be alright - and actually believe it myself. 

We approched the front door and as Jacob reached the handle, I held my breath. He turned to me, leaned over and kissed my forehead. "You know, babe, we shouldn't worry so much. It isn't healthy for you or junior". I couldn't help but giggle a little. Jake tried his best to look offically offended, but his smile gave him away. 

He pushed the door opened, still hand in hand, walked inside. 

All four of us sat at the quite grandiose dining room table. Mr. Black, or as he asked me to call him - for now- Billy, sat at the head of the table at the right end. Sarah sat to his side right side. Both of them looked genuinely happy to have me over. They were lovely people, but when handed a complicated situation, people quickly change. 

Jacob inisted that we side on left side of table, with me to side. I could feel he was trying to protect me. But maybe he was the one who would need protected. Its the least I  
>could manage to do for him, right now. <p>

Sarah led the dinner conversation with the typical, run-of-the mill, question and answer session. I didn't like being put on the spot, but Jake did go through it with my mom, and she was ten times worse. 

Sarah dapped her napkin cloth-thing around her mouth -even though there was nothing there to begin with-, smile and looked across the table to me. "So, Renesmee, I must say that is a very unique name, very lovely. How did your parents ever think of it?". 

I set my fork down and looked to her. "Well, I was named after my grandmothers. Esme and Renee. My parents combined the names. They told me there was no way their child would have a name you'd name everyday. She'd be one of a kind". Jake smiled next to me and said,"You certainly are". I could just feel the blush rush to my cheeks. Sarah looked like she was about to cry. 

"Mom, whats wrong?" 

Sarah wiped by her eyes, probably trying to prevent make-up runnage. "Jake, honey, I'm jsut happy for you. Renesmee is simply wonderful". 

Thats where Jake took his cue. 

"Well, mom, dad, I'm glad you think so. We have news to tell you". 

Billy and Sarah looked truly taken back by this. Billy cleared his throat before he spoke,"Ok, son, whats this news?". 

Jake grabbed for my hand under the table. He held it a bit tighter than usual, so I gave him a reassuring squeeze and a nod to continue. 

With a deep breath the words seemed to flow out,"Ness and I are having a baby".

Billy started choking on his drink, Sarah gasped and I swear my heart rate dropped several points.

I heard a fist drop down on the table. "Jacob you cannot be serious! How irresponsible of you!".

Sarah looked like she had seen a ghost. "Honey, are you guys sure? Have you been to a doctor?".

Jake spoke before I could. "Yes and yes. She's almost 12 weeks along now. We have a sonogram picture somewhere...".

I directed my eyes to my purse, which Jake took, opened up and retrieved the photo.

"See, this is real".

Sarah reached over the table and took it from Jake's hand. "Jacob Ephriam Black, you are far too young to be taking on this responbility. What about your future? You were going to go to pre-law school in the fall...What now?".

At this point, I was tearing up. This whole thing was falling apart very quickly.

Before Jacob could speak again, his father jumped in. "I'll tell you what now. You will put the baby up for adoption. Niether of you need this".

I could barely pull enough of voice to do so, but I spoke up. "No, I will not give my baby up".

Billy turned from me to Jacob,"Do you agree with her?"

Jake nodded.

Billy was fuming. "Then I want you out of my house. Adult actions lead to adult responibilies. You can figure everything out for yourself from here on out".

I could see Jake wanted to protest, but he took my hand in his again. "I'll be out of here by morning then".

He led me over to the door and before fully exiting he turned around to his parents,"I'll be back for my stuff later. I'm sorry you feel this way".

* * *

><p><strong>So, some trouble with the Blacks. The couple expected nothing less, but of course Jake didn't expect being kicked out. What will happen next time? Hmm..<strong>

**Next update will be some time next week. I'll be away this weekend, so I won't be able to sit and write until Monday. **


	16. Reflection

**A/N: Ok, guys, I'll keep things brief. But I have a few things to clear up.**

**1). I'll be keeping my updates to twice a month. I know they've been very drawn out, its just a lot has happened in the last few months and I have to work on balancing it all.**

**2). This is a fluff chapter. This story will get heavy from here on out. I will throw in a fun chapter, though, every so often to soften it up. The chapter WILL still hold relevance.**

**3). I will not very often (if again in this story), use another POV other than Renesmee.**

**Now, that I have all of that out of the way... lets get on with it! (:**

* * *

><p><strong>Last time...<strong>

_Billy was fuming. "Then I want you out of my house. Adult actions lead to adult responibilies. You can figure everything out for yourself from here on out".  
><em>

_I could see Jake wanted to protest, but he took my hand in his again. "I'll be out of here by morning then".  
><em>

* * *

><p>My mother handed me a few of the spare balnkets she could find.<p>

She was exhausted, I was exhausted...Hell, we were all exhausted. Tonight hadn't been exactly fun.

I could no longer hold back my yawn.

Mom let out a barely audible sigh. "I can barely get over the fact that they kicked him out".

I shrugged my shoulders. " I know".

"Honestly, I want to do nothing more than march over there and give those two a piece of my mind. I mean, who does that child, reguardless if they're eighteen?". She wasn't going to let this go.

And I didn't want her to.

"Renesmee, in the morning I'm going over there, sitting their pathetic asses down and ripping them a new one".

I raised a brow. "Mom?"

"Yeah?"

"Technically, it's already morning..."

She chuckled. "You know what I meant, Miss Logic. Anyway, it's late," she smirked then corrected herself," I mean, early, so you should get some rest. My grandbaby is tired and you look it as well. I'll go take these blankets down to Jacob".

"Thanks, Mom. Goodnight, I love you". She pulled me into a hug.

"I love you, too. My Nessie".

* * *

><p><strong>BPOV<br>**

All the lights were out for the night, aside from the two table lamps in the livingroom.

I slowly approached the entry to the room, peeking in to see Jacob laying on the couch,

facing opposite from me.

I'm not exactly sure why, but not really wanting to startle him, I knocked gently on the wood frame.

Jacob sat up quickly. He looked...worried.

"Hey, I brought these for you". I gave him a soft smile.

"Thank you, Mrs. Cullen".

I laughed lightly and shook my head. "Jake, you can call me Bella. Everyone else does".

"Okay, uh, Thank you...Bella". And he smiled softly.

Under a tough exterior, I could see the hurt. He may have been an eighteen year old young man, but his father's words did some serious damage.

At least he had us to help him out, right now.

For a few minutes it was just silent. Not really an awkward silence, but more comforting.

Jacob maybe twenty years younger , my daughter's boyfriend and my grandchild's father, but his presence was that of a friendly comfort.

But I suppose all of those reasons are why it should be that.

He sighed.

"I really don't know what I'm going to do after I go back and get my stuff later".

"Everything will be fine, Jacob".

"Really? My parents kicked me out over this".

"Hey, now...What if I went over there with you. I can talk to them, you know, parent to parent".

He made a breathy laugh noise and shook his head lightly. "When we told you, well, lets just say that the things you said compared to the things they said made you look like a saint".

I couldn't help but smile.

"They told us to put the baby up for adoption".

I shook my head. "Well, they don't have that say in this. It's all you guys".

"We know, thats what we told them. And then dad kicked me out".

"Ok, well , Jake, lets take it this with them one step at a time. We'll go pick up your stuff and then you will come back here and you will stay here. You're family now, it's what we do for family".

I could easily see the surprise in his eyes.

"Really?"

"Yes, Jacob. Really".

"Thank you".

I gave him a big hug, and I finally realized that maybe there could be worse guys than him to be my grandchild's father.


	17. Man in the Mirror

JPOV- Chapter 17 Man in the Mirror

The walk to the front door was excruciatingly dragging. Each step forward was begining to feel more and more like taking three steps backwards.

The nerves between myself and Mrs. Cullen- I mean, Bella - were overfilling the area.

I turned to her once we reached the porch and hesitated to proceed. She stepped up the few steps to the door, held out her small hand and offered her warm, motherly smile.

I was eighteen for Christ's sake, I shouldn't be this afraid to confront my parents.

But no one knew my parents like I did. No one knew the how my dad instilled this fear in me to control me. I didn't want him to use it against me today.

Bella grabbed my hand, and lead me up. She turned to me, nodded and rung the doorbell.

For the first time in months, I was scared shitless.

"Jake, it will be ok. Just get your stuff while I talk to them".

I offered her an unsure nod.

"Hey, now, you can do this. I know you can".

I exhaled. Now or never.

My mother answered the door and she looked genuinely surprised.

Here eyes narrowed a bit. "Jacob, what are you doing here? Your father is on his way back and he won't be very happy. He's already stressed out enough and...".

"He just wanted to stopped and get some of his things before he comes back over. Hello, my name is Bella Cullen". She extended her hand for a proper introduction, but my mother rejected the offer. Bella did her best to remain looking unaffected.

My mother sighed. "Fine, Jacob, but please hurry up. I don't want anymore trouble than you've already created". She stepped inside and gestured us in.

I took the lead, after Bella's insistence, and waited for her cue.

"Mrs. Black, while Jacob is gathering some things, why don't we chat a bit. Mother to mother".

Mom just shrugged and exhaled with defeat. "Fine, I knew this would be coming soon enough. By the way, you may call me Sarah".

Bella looked to my direction and gave me a small nod.

I headed upstairs to pack my bags.

Then it hit me: this would be the last time I'd ever step into my room again.

It was very bittersweet. I was gaining so much - a beautiful girlfriend, a child and a new family- but losing just as much in the process.

My childhood may have been far from perfect - with an overly demanding father and a mother always seeking this unknown perfection- but I carried those memories close to me. They would be all I'd have now. Those and a few pictures take with me.

With this sudden heaviness, I tossed and carried the duffle bag over my shoulder.

Step by step, I walked farther from my past and closer to my future. But thats a good thing, right? I'd have my Renesmee and our baby.

_Yes. This is a good thing,_ I told myself as I continued my way down the stairs_._

In the livingroom, I could see my mother and Bella sitting across from each other. Bella was sitting in the armchair facing the stairs and her gaze slowly moved towards me.

"I'm sorry we couldn't come to an understanding today, Sarah", Bella said my mother.

I could see the back of my mother's head shake. "Like I told you and Jacob several time, he made his choices and they lead to a consequence. When he decides he has been foolish and chooses to direct this consequence to be fixed, then he is welcomed back home. Where he really belongs".

I moved towards the door, Bella and my mother got up and made their way to the same direction.

Looking down to my mother, I couldn't help but say," When you decided that you have been foolish, I'll be staying with the Cullens. Where I belong".


	18. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

Hello all. I know it's been quite sometime, but here's a new chapter. There's a little bit of everything. It does have a Christmas theme, but this Holiday is anything but a presents and candy canes for Ness and Jake.

So, Happy Holidays everyone! and New Year, as well! (:

Basic disclaimer, blah blah blah.

* * *

><p>Chap 18- Renesmee POV<p>

_Previously..._

_Looking down to my mother, I couldn't help but say," When you decided that you have been foolish, I'll be staying with the Cullens. Where I belong"._

* * *

><p><strong>Nine weeks &amp; 3 days later...<strong>

Today was the day, finally.

I sat impaitently at the table during breakfast, my foot constantly shaking. Amused glances were all the while being exchanged mom, Jake and Charley.

It was a week until Christmas and there was really only gift that I had on my mind.

Jake placed his hand on my knee, smiled and kissed my cheek.

"No need to get all anxious, Ness. It's only two more hours".

But I couldn't help myself. Why? Because we were going to find out the sex of the baby.

Charley, along with Aunt Alice, Uncle Jasper and Grandpa Carlisle had their bets on a girl.

Of course Jacob was on the side with the boy bets. It didn't surprise me that Uncle Emmett was, as well.

Mom did her best to keep neutral, like myself. As long as he or she is happy and healthy, than mission part one complete.

Still, part of me longed for a little black hair, creamy russet skinned boy, with piercing dark eyes...

Like I said, happy and healthy.

_Oh, who am I kidding?_

My mom let out a fustrated sigh and placed her hand on my knee giving it a small squeeze.

~~~SF~~~

"Renesmee, stop with the leg shaking already, _please_. I know you're excited and very anxious, honey, but so are we. You're name will be called soon", she paused to give a simple reassuring smile. "Meanwhile the entire Cullen is supposedly on their way...", mom added with irritated tone, but even she couldn't resist the tiniest smile when Aunt Alice seemed to flitter her way over to us.

Before I could even acknowledge their presence, Alice had me swept up in unseemingly bear hug.

"Oh my God, Renesmee. It's been too long! Let me get a look at you!", Alice excitedly said to me as she pulled me from my seat.

She held me out at her arms length and gave me a look up and down.

Nope, I don't feel self-conscious. Not at all.

"I swear by everything I know about fashion- and thats a lot- that you are one of the most beautiful pregnant women I have ever seen. Right up there with your mother".

Her delicate, small pixie hands went to my protruding, twenty-one week pregnant baby bump. She smile brightly and looked up to me.

Alice looked over to the Cullen clan. Yes, clan is the correct term. All of the were here: Grandpa Carlisle & Grandma Esme, Aunt Rosalie & Uncle Emmett and Uncle Jasper, along with Alice who looked like she was about to start crying.

Esme reached out to her and embraced her in a hug.

With the whole ordeal with Dad leaving, there were countless times I could've used a hug that. But everything happens for a reason and they're all here with us now.

I look around at my whole family, which pretty much consists of everyone in the small lobby. Charley was hugging Grandpa, Mom was introducing a very terrified looking Jacob to Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie. I couldn't help but smile at that. While, Esme and Alice claimed they were now moving onto the boy side of the bet...and then they started tearing up, again.

It's hard not to love people who support and accept you at the most complicated of times.

Not long after we all found our way over to sit down, I was called to go back.

Mom, Charley and Jake stood up to go with me.

Then, I could see it..and feel it. I knew what I had to do.

I walked over to Esme. "Grandma, would you like to go back with us?".

She looked completely surprised, and not trusting her voice, simply nodding her head.

I reached out for her hand and headed over to the door that led to the hallway of exam rooms.

The nurse led us about halfway down the hall into a slightly bigger room. I smiled and thanked her.

Once I was all situated, the Doctor came in, introduced herself to everyone that came with me, and made sure all of her equipment was ready to go for the ultrasound.

Jake moved over next to me. His warm hand stroked my hair lightly. He sweetly kissed my forehead.

I looked up and smiled at him. I was happy that I had him in my life. Yes, we were young, but I wouldn't be doing this if I knew I couldn't- that we couldn't.

The Doctor subtly cleared her throat.

"Alright folks, let's find out what you're having, shall we?".

The tiny being growing inside me was now on the screen. Around the room, I could her my mom, sister and grandma aww-ing. The occassional sniffle couldn't be missed either. I slightly turned my head to see the three of them all holding hands.

"Okay, Miss Cullen, it looks like you have a little...", she said teasingly.

We all let out a little nervous laugh.

"Boy in the oven".

_Boy._

_A son._

_My son, our son._

Jake hugged me the best that he could with me on the table and kissed me. Over and over again, he told me "thank you".

_No, Jake. Thank you.  
><em>

** ~~~~~One week later...Christmas Day!~~~~~~~  
><strong>

As we headed up to the Cullen family mansion, Jake and I could barely hold back our excitment.

At dinner we were going to announce the baby's name!

Everyone was already assembled in living room, near the foyer, to greet us. Of course, leave it to Alice and Emmett to try and get Jake to slip up on the name. I had to bail him out four times.

_Persistent bear-sized man and little pixie._

Before dinner was placed out, Emmett and Jasper asked to speak with me alone. The whole conversation consisted of "if the Jacob doesn't treat you or that little boy right, we'll beat his ass".

Of course, I bursted out laughing.

They were dead serious.

I hugged them both and told them I appreciated the sentiment, but if he did that I have his balls in a second.

They high-fived me and said I was definitely my father's daughter. I could instantly see the regret after they said that on they're faces.

I shrugged it off and told them to not worry about it. It's anciet history now.

Alice skipped from room to room making sure that everyone knew it was time to get to the table for dinner.

As we all sat down, Carlisle stood up to give the toast. He gave thanks we were finally reunited and that he was able to see his great-grandson. He was beaming.

Before everyone got into their discussions, Jake and I stood up.

"Everyone, I want to thank you for being part of this journey this with us. A child's life is incomplete without family, and I know my son has the best family to fill his life with. That's why we chose today to share what his name will be, with you all".

They all lit up in smiles.

I could feel Jake's palm begin to heat up even more. It's good to know he's nervous, too.

"So, everyone," I put a hand on and looked down to my bump," this is Masen Ephriam Nikolas Black".

My family gave out small round of applause and hugs.

We all proceeded back to our seats and continued with the meal.

Before I could even register, it was time for gifts. This year I had more than I could've even imagined. But this was the Cullen's and things were not done simply. A good and bad thing.

The last few presents were beign opened as the doorbell rang.

We looked around and shared the same confused expression.

_Who would be at the door on Christmas Day?_

Grandpa Carlisle stood up. "I'll go see who that is. You guys continue on, I'll be right back".

A few moments later, we heard a bit of arguing from the foyer.

Carlisle was trying to keep quiet, but there was no mistaken on the name I heard. I just wasn't confirmed until he walked into the room, looking rather surprised.

Everyone gasped in surprise. No one spoke immeditately. I mean, what do you say to a ghost from your past who just vanished?

But Rosalie found the words.

"Edward, what the hell are you doing _here_?"


	19. When One Door Opens

RPOV Chapter 19

Edward- or should I maybe say my father- just stood there, mouth slightly ajar, in an almost frozen state. Maybe the fact that everyone was here took him by surprise, or maybe it was just that mom, myself and Charley were here that shook him.

I turned to look at my mother, who held her arms protectively around Charely, who sat next to her. Jake did the same to me. She just glared at him.

"You always knew how to ruin a family moment, Edward", her death stare continued.

"Well, thank you for the warm welcome Bella", my father sarcastically added.

That did it for Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper. All three of them jumped from their respective places in the room and sauntered over to dad. Emmett full on grabbed him and Rose gave him a good punch.

"You have no right walking in here and throwing out that crap with that kind of attitude. The woman has been through Hell and back, keeping herself sane for those beautiful girls...the ones you up and left".

After some hesitation, I stood up. I felt all eyes in the room on me.

I walked towards the man who once was a great father, his eyes wide, finally taking in the state of my pregnancy.

"Oh, yeah, she did a real great job if my little girl is knocked up", he threw out.

Mom stood from her own place, kissed Charley on the forehead and made her way to dad. "Don't mock my job as a mother, you pathetic low life bastard", she knew didn't need to resort to being physical to cause him to be in pain. "Emmett, get him outside. It's time this _man _and I have a talk".

Rosalie didn't hesitate is assisting, of course, she opened the front door and with one quick, fluent motion Emmett had my father outside. Mom followed suit.

I looked around to the remaining family members in the living room. Grandma Esme was doing her best to appear strong, but even she couldn't hide the tears. Grandpa and Alice soothed her, while Jasper moved over to myself and Jake. Jake rubbed small, circular motions on my back and Jasper held my hands. I was definitely becoming a lot more calm, now.

In a soft almost whispering tone, Jasper leaned forward and asks me," You don't want to miss that outside do you?". I shook my head no. He sighs softly. "Of course not. Just like your mother. Wait here, I'll get your coat", he stands up and places a hand on Jake's shoulder. "You should join us. It would be best for Renesmee, because in all honesty, I don't whats going to happen. But it won't be good, at least not for a while".

After all of our coats were on, we stood on the porch. Rose and Emmett were staring dad down, while mom was pacing back and forth. Dad looked like he was trying to find the proper words to say, but really, what exactly can you say to beg for your family's forgiveness?

He didn't just hurt my mom, myself or Charley. No, he also left scars with his parents, his siblings and even their spouses.

Dad was always clever, but no amount of that could really dig himself out of this hole anytime soon. Mom would make him work for anything he wanted.


	20. Choose Your Moves Carefully

**A/N: Okay, to switch things up and to get a clear veiw on all of Edward's choices, this chapter will be in his POV.**

**I will not make excuses for my absence with this story, even though the crazy, hecticness of my life took over for the last several months. I do, though, promise to do my very best to continue with this piece. It's very important to me to finish this story, having been working on the idea since late 2010.**

**Anyway, without further delay, I give you chapter 20.**

* * *

><p><em><strong>EPOV<strong>_

The sun was hidden away that day, just like it is today. The gray cloud cover set the mood for this ever-so-merry-christmas day.

Even though the difference would be the ground covering.

Snow. _I haven't been outside in the snow in over two years._

She stood about twelve feet before me, pacing back and forth. The same fierceness radiated from her -she was always a spitfire. Her hair fell down towards her lower back, now. Those brown eyes both were full of sorrow and wanting to kick my ass.

_And there is no way I'd deny Bella that, I throughly deserved it._

Bella finally came to a standstill, staring me dead in the eyes. Yeah, she wanted to kill. But I could never blame her.

"Edward, you have about two seconds to tell me, no, to tell us where the hell you've been all this time".

I inhaled deeply, and held it a second.

"Your time is ticking away, Edward".

I exhaled. "I can tell you everything, but I just know the truth is far worse than the unknown".

Bella shook her head, I could hear my brother mutter some comment under his breath, my father sigh, my mother sniffling from her tears and my daughters move closer to the steps of the porch.

"Okay. It all started about six months before I left. There was a late night at work where I needed to catch up before the big pitch meeting, so I was there with Peter and Tanya - my assistant at the time. You and I, Bella, had just had our biggest arugement yet earlier that day and I was just so stressed out...

It must've been after midnight at that point, Peter told me he needed to get home and that I should do the same. After he left, Tanya...changed. I can't exactly explain it, but I knew what she was thinking. It was all in her body language. It was all so wrong, but I couldn't help but think it, too...and well, I ended up sleeping with her. The guilt began to consume me, but I was filled with this adrenaline rush everytime. Knowing you could be caught at any time.

Our affair continued, as wrong, dysfunctional and downright messed up as it was. About six weeks after it began, the rumors began floating around work. Peter confronted me several times, each time I denied anything going on. For that period, the affair was the only thing that I felt like I had control over, but even that control only lasted a short while.

I really cannot remember how, when and why, but Tonya developed her grasp. Once she had me hooked on the drugs, I was done for. I needed my fix and sleeping with her was the only way she'd give me anymore. I was losing my control. In that last week was when Peter confronted for the final time. He told me,"to get help and to open up to you" and finally that I had lied to him after years of friendship and business partners.

Two days later, when you and girls were gone off doing your daily things, I came home from work, packed up and left. I ran off with Tanya, but that didn't last longer than a year. Then I came to my senses, somehow I don't know, and admitted myself into rehab.

That sums everything up until here today".

With everyone ounce of her strength, Bella gave me her hardest right hook to the face.

_I told you the truth would be painful, Bella. I told you._

My brother-in-law stood by her side, I wouldn't exactly say restraining her, but persuading her that this wasn't the way to go about things. He always had a way with those types of things.

Bella looked me dead in the eyes. "You're a pathetic bastard, Edward". And then made her way back into the house, leaving myself, my family and our daughters standing there taking every event of the day in.


End file.
